Regis Philbin on Uppers-In More Ways Than One.

Happy WIAW, featuring “sensible snacking” courtesy of Jenn at Peas and Crayons!! Let me tell you, the lady knows her stuff about snacking, we were just texting about it last night before my phone went and kerflooeyed. (that’s a real word, because I just used it.) I DID snack sensibly yesterday, before I went and made nutella biscotti. It went all to hell after that.

As you read yesterday, I went to YOGA. The class for the quiet and centered. I am about as quiet and centered as Regis Philbin hyped up on meth and viagra. I got there and immediately got the “scared shitless sweats”. Tons of things were running through my head, “how are YOU going to be quiet for this long??” “there aren’t any weights involved, no running either!!” “You should probably do yourself and everyone else a favor and just walk away right now.”

Self-doubt makes me angry. I doubted myself far too damn long to keep that shit up. I mean, really. If you don’t believe in yourself, who in the heck is going to believe in you? For real, I’m pretty sure Santa and the Tooth Fairy aren’t going to pop up from behind the ladies doing sun salutations to cheer me on. As it was, I was sans children’s mythological creatures, so I sucked it up and went in.

Here’s the thing, I am NOT flexible. It took me a month of stretching to touch my toes. My balance? Also not the best. I am going to blame it on an effed up equilibrium, due to total right side deafness, but it’s more likely the result of my heavy coffee habit, and all of the college drinking. (Just so you know, even half lit, I can still rattle off the periodic table of elements. Fully lit will only get you some of them.)

I also have a mostly paralyzed left hand/weak left wrist. This led to me forming a fist to hold myself in a pose instead of the flat hand the others were using. I bit it. Fell clean over. “Hi Matt, I’m Face, I’ll be the one assaulting you with my nose and teeth.”

But I got.it.done. I am in NO WAY a yogi. In fact, I don’t know if I’ll ever go back. I had to pretend my mouth was duct taped shut, just to get through. This got me a correction from the teacher because, apparently, I was supposed to be using my mouth to exhale. When I told her I wasn’t “waiting to exhale” just using my nose instead, she did NOT get the joke. A little piece of me died. All I can say is…

THANK G-D IT’S NATIONAL RUNNING DAY!! I’ve got my short shorts and Prefontaine ‘stache ready to go. My ipod has some freshly downloaded tunes and books, and my shoes are laced up right. Oh, hell, yes.

On to the food portion of what I ate yesterday!!!

yoga mat,(tastes like strep!) fruit with yogurt and granola parfait, buckwheat pancakes with berries and chocolate, popcorn, stuffed mac and cheese peppers, kale and veggie stir fried whole wheat noodles, and the icing on the cake? Nutella biscotti.

Yes, you read that right, nutella biscotti. It has slivered almonds in it. It’s awesome.

Nutella Biscotti

by Cat Tan

Prep Time: 10 minutes

Cook Time: 1 hr 30 minutes

Keywords: bake entree dessert cookie bars Italian

Ingredients

  • 1 stick butter, softened
  • 1/4 cup nutella
  • 1 cup sugar
  • 3 eggs
  • 1 tbsp vanilla
  • 1 tbsp baking powder
  • 2 1/2 cups flour
  • 3/4 cup cocoa powder
  • 1/2 tsp salt
  • 1 cup slivered almonds

Instructions

Preheat oven to 350F

whip sugar, nutella, and butter together until smooth on high in a mixer or with beaters

add in eggs, vanilla, and salt turn mixer to low

sift in cocoa powder, flour, and baking powder, stir until just combined

fold in almonds

using 2 baking sheets, form the dough into 2, 13″-3″ logs, one per sheet

bake for 30 minutes, allow to cool almost entirely on baking racks

using a serrated blade, cut the logs on the bias, 3/4″ thick.

place biscotti back on the baking rack, on top of a cookie sheet, and bake for 25 more minutes.

serve with coffee.

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