Walking Is Overrated.

I have no idea how it is that I am expected to function or move today. You see, I spent several hours last night getting the ever-loving hell kicked out of me by one of my best friends, the Navajo. It’s not because he finally got tired of my lip, but because we were working on fight choreography.

Every muscle in my body aches in a way it hasn’t since I began Crossfit. I thought I was tough. I row, I go to Crossfit, I am slowly starting to run again, AND I chase my kids all day. I liked my happy little bubble. It was comfortable. It was like a warm and cozy cocoon where I felt like the king of the castle.

Oh dear Lord. I forgot how much getting hit hurts. Trust me, even stage hits, when done enough, leave you breathless. I was tossed over my partner’s shoulder more times than I care to admit. It sort of went like this

“Up-thud. Up-thud. HEY!!-thud WHAT THE?!-thud” I did my fair share of tossing, too, but it really felt weak next to being thrown about like a rag doll. Not to mention that I was being taught how to execute a spinning high kick. Much hilarity ensued. At one point, the sifu *may* have doubled over laughing. I am pretending he was laughing at the others, and not just me. I’m probably wrong.

This was only exacerbated by the fact that Broadway Baby decided to tag along for comic relief. By comic relief, I mean he came along to make fun of me. It’s really difficult to block a punch when your GBF is spouting lines from “AbFab” from the sidelines. The next job he has where he has to train, I am LAYIN INTO HIS ASS.

But there is something incredibly empowering about tossing a man who is 4″ taller and 40lbs heavier over your shoulder like so much luggage. Why on earth is this not a more popular form of exercise? Especially for women? It gives you confidence in yourself you never knew was there, it allows for a safe environment in which to unleash your stress and frustrations, and calling it “a good workout” seems to be a ridiculous understatement. I think I feel my armpit muscle. I had no idea there was even space for pain there. Let’s not even discuss my lower calves and triceps. En.Fuego.

I basically showered and fell into bed after training, unable to do more than just look at my kindle and lovingly stroke it, because holding it up wasn’t an option. That means I woke up with a fierce hunger and general hangry-ness. Oatmeal wasn’t going to cut it. I needed something more. I wanted something filling and full of energy.

I wanted hash. I didn’t want meat, though. I just wanted eggs over other stuffs. So I made my legendary vegetarian hash, and took pictures of it to share with you scamps.

Filled with 4 kinds of potatoes, mushrooms, onions, peppers, parsnips and spices, it is perfect as a dinner side dish or topped with eggs for breakfast and brunch. You can even add black beans or tofu to make it a complete meal in a completely different direction. It’s addictive and you’ll be making it for years to come after you make it once.

Vegetarian Hash

vegetarian hash 2 vegetarian hash 3 vegetarian hash

Vegetarian Hash

by Cat Bowen

Prep Time: 15 minutes

Cook Time: 10 minutes

Keywords: blender microwave saute appetizer breakfast side snack vegan vegetarian

Ingredients (serves 6)

  • 1 lb mixed potatoes (blue, red, yukon) scrubbed and microwaved until fork tender
  • 1 large sweet potato scrubbed and microwaved until fork tender
  • 1 large parsnip peeled, chopped, and microwaved until fork tender
  • 2 large peppers, chopped into chunks
  • 1 large onion, sliced
  • 6 oz sliced crimini or other mushrooms
  • 1 sprig thyme
  • 1 tsp chopped garlic
  • salt and pepper
  • 2 tbsp evoo


chop everything into bite sized chunks

heat oil in a skillet on medium

add mushrooms and cook until brown on medium high

add onion and cook until translucent

reduce heat to medium and add garlic

add all other ingredients and cook until edges are crisp

taste for seasoning

top with fried eggs

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6 thoughts on “Walking Is Overrated.

  1. Nothing better than getting your a$$ kicked 8-ways to Sunday to feel the burn. I like the idea of slinging the man over your shoulder a la sack of potatoes, I can think of plenty of instances that would come in handy. Drooling over the yolk porn above, yum!
  2. If it wasn't for the mushrooms, this would be the perfect meal. Also, there are times when I had your job, due to the ass-kicking nature of it. And then I remember that when you're not going for the armpit muscle pain, you're probably doing things that involve people looking at you, and that wouldn't work. I am more of a "behind the scenes" type of gal.

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