Eating Butter in Your Sleep With Tiger Woods.

The holidays are REALLY stressful. There’s all the baking and the drinking, and the decorating, and it’s easy to let yourself be last on the list.

That sucks. It doesn’t just suck for you, because I guarantee the people around you notice your crabbiness. Achieving balance can seem impossible. I am here to tell you it isn’t. My fellow FitFluential Ambassadors and I are all trying to give 5 ways of achieving balance during the holidays, with the mantra being, “eat, sleep, move, and enjoy.”

I would add one more word to their mantra: breathe. Somewhere between sleeping and enjoying, is breathing. Stepping back, taking a minute to meditate on the blessings bestowed upon you, and being thankful for them. I may not be able to take trips to the Caribbean twice a year, but I have two beautiful kids, a great husband, a nice home, friends that I love, and for the time being, one hell of a rack. (Thanks to the second beautiful child. Gosh, I’m gonna miss these.)

Fill your body with things that will give you energy, pleasure, and health. If you think healthy food can’t be delicious, you are nuts. I make it a point to serve my family healthy, nutritious, and TASTY meals every night. -Not Rachael Ray “healthy”, meaning cheese on meat with a bacon side dish, served with a side of product placement, but REALLY healthy. (A recipe shall follow, are you surprised?) Although, I’d really love a steady diet of salt and vinegar chips with pimento cheese on white bread, but that would eventually just taste like being back in the plus sized section.

Sleep. I am going to have to remind myself of what that is. I have a teething infant. When I remember what that is, I’ll let you know. I hear the word “sleep” right now, and all I can think of is Tiger Woods having ambien fueled affairs with tiny women. I would let the Lunesta butterfly float towards me, but I don’t want to eat a stick of butter in my sleep,” and then go on a joyride in my neighbor’s car.

MOVE. This one is my favorite. Even though I am currently debating in my head as to whether or not to hit the gym because I have a shitton of stuff to do, I like to move it move it. To be fair, I did just go CRAZY cleaning my apartment, including vacuuming the sofa crevices, and steam mopping the WHOLE PLACE. But if the rain holds out, I am going to run like hell. The more you move, the more endorphins you produce, the less Uncle Chester bugs the pee out of you. Also, muscle burns more calories than fat-true story. Pump the iron before hitting the cookies.

I also find that the more active I am, the better I want to eat. When I am inactive, I am perfectly happy living on sugar, beer, and toothpaste. (Gotta prevent cavities.)

Enjoy. Enjoy your family. Enjoy your friends. Enjoy a cocktail or two, have a cookie, have some crudite, sit on an old, obese man’s lap and tell him all of your dreams. Light a candle, spin a dreidel, watch movies that make you feel good. Hide your dad’s teeth and see how long he’ll go without wearing them. (answer? a REALLY long time.)

Enjoy good food. Really good food.

That, my friends, is heaven.

Indian Lamb Burgers with Goat Cheese

Indian Lamb Burgers with Goat Cheese


  • 1 lb ground lamb
  • 1/4 cup chopped scallion
  • 1/2 cup chopped cilantro
  • 1 T cumin
  • 1 t coriander
  • 1 T chopped garlic
  • 1.5 t minced ginger
  • 1 t salt
  • 1/2 tsp pepper
  • 4 oz goat cheese
  • baby lettuce leaves and cilantro for serving
  • pita bread
  • tomatoes


  1. chop cilantro and scallions
  2. mix together meat, cumin, coriander, garlic, ginger, salt, pepper, cilantro, and scallion with your hands
  3. form into 4 patties
  4. fry on each side until med (about 3 mins per side on high)
  5. top with goat cheese
  6. serve with tomatoes, greens, and pita

8 thoughts on “Eating Butter in Your Sleep With Tiger Woods.

  1. This is my favorite post of yours so far (and you know I've loved 'em all!). The eat one is hardest for me... I used to struggle with the holidays because I'd binge like crazy on all the goodies that are available. Now, that's not an issue anymore, BUT with my schedule being nuts I tend to eat foods that don't make me feel as great (like eating leftover white bean dip and chips from our party for three nights in a row). For me, it's really important to remember that proper meals of healthy foods aren't just a weight control thing, but they truly do keep me more grounded than the other stuff.
  2. If there were a way, I would TOTALLY share my boobs with you once you are done nursing. I really, really would. (In a "you get to have some" way, not in a "you get to touch them" way, obvs.) I am planning on eating, sleeping, and moving this weekend, and am really looking forward to it! Fantastic post. And great recipe. Yum.

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